evynn claire | week two

we're two weeks old!

I won't always do weekly updates, just for now while everything is so new ;)

this face. literally this face. she makes it everytime we pick her up when she's sleeping and i cannot help but kiss that silly, adorable face!!

 

 

she loves short walks outside with daddy in the sunshine, cuddling in the moby wrap,cluster eating (which means binge watching netflix for this momma, but who's complaining?), being swaddled with her arms out,  sleeping from 6am-9am, and lifting her head way up and looking around

she dislikes keeping both socks on, waiting to nurse (when the girl wants to eat, she wants to eat NOW), having wet diapers, sleeping at proper night hours

she has beautiful grey/blue eyes, cute little hairs on the tips of her ears, perfect lips, and the loudest toots that could possibly come out of a little girl

^this is our getting mad because she ready to eat face

first manicure with mimi ;)

y'all. this blog post "when love feels heavy" hit me hard the other day. it's no lie i've been struggling with exhaustion these two weeks of motherhood, this was such a great read to know that I'm not alone! in the 4am feedings and a screaming infant who i can't seem to soothe, i found myself questioning if i did have "baby blues". I always craved to be pregnant, i loved being pregnant, i could.not.wait to meet our sweet daughter and cuddle her newborn self, so why was I not head over heels in love now?! I hated myself for not being completely smitten for this precious baby girl but I blame that (now) on utter exhaustion. a quote from this article:

You may feel like you will nearly break in half from the top-heaviness. You will not be able to tell the difference between exhaustion and depression, and that darkness will rob you from what should be the most tender months of your daughter's new life. 

so here I am cuddling with my two week old and I can truly say, I am in love with this little being. the exhaustion is still here, especially in the middle of the night. but we're managing. thank the Lord for pacifiers, swings, swaddles, and the best daddy around for making the transition do-able. The moments ( a few days ago) that caused me to cry out in desperation for help are now moments that I spend in prayer and holding her sweet hand while she nurses or stroke her sweet, soft baby hairs. I'm soaking in these moments. A friend of mine text me the other day "the days are long but the years are short" and isn't that the truth! I already look at her teeny newborn clothes and know she won't always be this small. I want to treasure these moments. So praise the Lord for getting me out of the rut of feeling like I wasn't meant for this motherhood business, like I would never sleep again, and that I didn't know what I was getting in to. Here's to late nights and early mornings, re-heating my coffee a few times before actually getting to drink it, sweet cuddles when her tummy is upset, and soaking in these moments when she needs me. 

and shoutout to my husband while we're on the mushy roll ;) Cody has helped me beyond what I can express. From getting up in the middle of the night to change diapers or walk evynn around to cheer her up to rubbing my back while I sit up in bed and nurse to buying post part pads at the store. he's watched me wear the same outfits on repeat for two weeks now and tells me that I'm beautiful as I examine my postpartum body. this guy is the best husband and daddy to myself and miss evynn!