this and that

first, this weekend some friends and I hosted Ashley's baby shower and had so much fun. Her precious baby bump is for real making my baby fever worse. 

After the shower, I visited with Cody's sister who graciously watched Ev during the shower, and then me and ev headed home. After a screaming sesh in the car all the way home, a car full of decorations to unload and the daunting feeling of knowing I'd spend the night alone for the first time in years, I felt hugely overwhelmed.I knew I could handle it and I could always call Cody or my parents to calm my nerves. Cody was out of town at a bachelor's party/Spurs game. I however have crazy bad anxiety when it comes to anyone I love traveling anddddd myself sleeping alone. Little creaks the house makes in the night may seem like nothing, but to me it's someone breaking in to get me. Pure nonsense, y'all. And my worry while my loved ones are traveling? that's a whole other story you may not want to ask my husband and parents about, ha! I've struggled with that since I was in 5th grade and my mom went to Mexico without me. pure meltdown. Now anytime anyone is traveling i'm on pins and needles until I know they're safe and sound. I should really grow up, ha. But it's a real issue. 

All that to say, Saturday night I put Evynn to sleep at 7:15 like normal and I sat in my bed on my computer. I closed my eyes briefly around 10 then back up till 12. At that point I decided I would feel better if Evynn was in my room with me and I could lock the doors of my room so I could feel the most safe. but, waking the girl up to move her to my room meant she was ready to party.... for the next 2 hours. At 2:00 (which then turned 3 due to time change) I was no longer scared, just plain exhausted. finally, we both fell asleep. Needless to say we spent all of Sunday catching up on our zzzz's from the night. My anxiety has been a constant struggle and constant prayer from myself and my husbands lips for years now. All nonsense but pure honesty.

Any who, Evynn for the past three days has taken 2 solid 2-hour naps/day and sleeping 12 hours at night, Praise the Lord. So, I'm spending her nap time catching up on our monthly budget doing some leisure blogging. 

this and that:

this article titled "you figured it out"is perfect, talking about how motherhood seems like day after day of "am i doing this right" and quite frankly, i might not but we're making it anyhow ;)

As the weather is warming, I cannot stop thinking about this summer- little one that will probably be walking around in a tiny bathing suit, making these 4th of july popsicles, and swimming... lots of swimming.

I cannot wait to channel Evynn's inner creativity with anything and everything, including these cardboard play houses